She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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