There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
Dear sober self: your car keys are in the glove compartment, your car is outside the church. I hope you're reading this from your own bed instead of someone else's.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Well I just put wine in my tea
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Randomize
