An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
