I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
