I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Randomize
