3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
if i can run in heels then i can drive
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Randomize
