Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Randomize
