You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
