would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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