U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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