i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
