office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
