I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize
