i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
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