She said her name was "party"
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I was sitting down, taking a piss with a boner, her cat walked into the bathroom and walked up to my legs, I sneezed and pissed all over her cat through between the toilet seat and bowl, it ran off screeching. She thought I peed on her cat on purpose. Kicked me out
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
