Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
