Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
