Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
