we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
