During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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