You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize
