rhymes with "ouble enetration"
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
