Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
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