I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
