Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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