goodnight i made you a song goodbye
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
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