I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize
