Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
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