Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
