So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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