What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
