Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
