You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
