I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize