We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
