Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
