I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
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