absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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