I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Rumble strips road head = magical
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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