Taylor Swift is so right about you.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
