He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I'm sobbing to NWA
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
Randomize
