Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
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