After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
