No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Found your dick twin last night
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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