if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Randomize
