I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
