just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Randomize
