so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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