Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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