The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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