Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
I should put together a new mom basket for her. It would have diapers, vodka, ambien, and tissues for when she cries about her wasted youth.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
