Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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